As student-athletes, we are constantly asked the question, "Why did you start playing (insert sport here)?"

I think the expectation is a well-thought-out response about how you fell in love with the sport as a little kid and always dreamed of playing in college. That's not quite my story. My relationship with the game of football was never that easy. As a little kid, I did fall in love, but not with a sport. Instead, I fell in love with someone else's love for football.
 
That someone else was my dad, Mike. In 1978, my Dad was recruited to play football in his home state at the University of Massachusetts. He played guard, wore #68 and was a part of three Yankee Conference championship teams during his career.
 

I grew up on UMass football. As little kids, my three siblings and I always went with my dad to UMass games to cheer on the Minutemen. My Dad was so passionate about the game of football - it was obvious that it was special to him. He always talked about it like it was one big life lesson and made it seem so glamorous.

Growing up, I idolized my Dad and so badly wanted to share his passions. I was infatuated with his energy, excitement, and gratitude towards the game and, ultimately, that's what inspired me to play.
 
 The beginning of my football career wasn't glamorous at all, however. I began playing in sixth grade and was not spectacular by any measure. I could catch and run, but I wasn't particularly big or particularly strong and didn't hit particularly hard. In fact, lining up five yards away from someone and running directly into each other wasn't fun for me at all.

Regardless, I knew that there was something special in the game – there had to be – just based on how much my dad loved it.

During my football career, he played many roles. He was a coach, analyst and critic of my technique. But above all else, he was an incredible motivator and always my biggest fan.

In high school, I would wake up on the first day of practice to find handwritten notes under my door.


And of course on game days.
 

I didn't realize it at the time, but these notes were the driving force of my football career.

I saved them over the years both literally and figuratively. They were a constant reminder of how much my dad believed in me and how much I should believe in myself. He predicted things like All-State and Division I Football before there was ever evidence of it happening. For that, I so badly wanted to prove him right and succeed.

What I came to find was that someone that believes in you beyond a doubt is perhaps the greatest motivator in life. That's what my dad was for me.

 

The Finish Line
The Finish Line is a special series on GoLeopards.com consisting of first-person stories written by graduating student-athletes, reflecting on their Lafayette experience. For full coverage of this weekend's graduation ceremonies, visit the link below. Commencement Home Page

Growing up, I was naive to what football was. The glory and excitement from my dad's football stories, championship rings and trips to UMass football games were consuming and made me blind to the potential disappointments and failures. Of course, wearing the jersey on gameday in high school and getting attention from the newspapers was enticing.

But what they don't tell you about as a little kid, is how vulnerable you make yourself when you let a dream consume you. I wanted to extract the passion for football that I always saw from my dad.

That included playing in college.
 
The recruiting process was a constant, up-and-down battle of self-confidence. During my senior year of high school, I was selling myself to any and every coach that would listen.

Whenever a coach would visit, I would wear Timberland boots to make myself appear a couple inches taller and wear at least three layers of clothing. The insecurities can multiply when people tell you that you aren't big or strong enough. But to my dad, that was never the reality.
 
One day, he received a forwarded email from a coach at Yale to my high school coach. He printed it out, highlighted it, and put it on my bed.
 
In fact, every time someone told me that I wasn't good enough, big enough, fast enough, strong enough, my dad would use it as inspiration.

Someone who watched me play once told me, "...when someone sees you celebrate a play, they would either think you are unbelievably cocky or really passionate."
 
I hope this proves it's the latter.

It's difficult to understand someone's passion until you've seen their pain. It comes from hundreds of hours spent practicing, training and preparing for the game. But it also comes from the failures and disappointments – and there were plenty of those.

During my time at Lafayette, there were reservations about my football abilities and role as the team's starting defensive end – questions of whether I was big enough, strong enough or good enough. It wasn't anything I hadn't seen before, but it was in a different context.

Because of the distance, the handwritten notes turned into text messages, but my dad's encouragement was always there.
 
It's easy to be fooled by a list of accomplishments and accolades.  Behind each of these is a struggle that was as real as ever.

In the time since finishing football, I've grown to become even more thankful for these than the successes because it has taught me the most valuable lesson in life: always believe in yourself.

My dad gave me that gift, exemplified in a poem he used to recite to my siblings and I when were little kids:

 
If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don't,
If you'd like to win, but you think you can't,
It is almost certain you won't.

If you think you'll lose, you're lost
For out of the world we find,
Success begins with a fellow's will;
It's all in the state of mind.
 
If you think you're outclassed, you are;
You've got to think high to rise,
You've got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win the prize.
 
Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger or faster man;
But sooner or later the man who wins
Is the one who thinks he can!
  
Dad - thank you for always making me think I can. I feel so blessed to have been given the bond of football that has taught me this lesson. I will forever be grateful.
   
As I approach the finish line, my parting words of wisdom are this:

Never underestimate the value of someone that believes in you.

Let them build you up, hold those people close, embrace them, squeeze every drop of belief out of them and then give it to someone else – it is the greatest gift we can give.
 
I am forever grateful for the privilege of playing football at Lafayette College. It has blessed me with invaluable opportunities, friendships and memories. Good luck to the Class of 2019 in all of your endeavors.
 
Always be chasing - Go Leopards!